Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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