i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
