Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
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He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Randomize