you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
Randomize
