It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
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