We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
