belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
Randomize
