what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
