I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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