Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
