If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
look on the scale of 1 to the time you hit an old lady with your car chlamydia barely even rates
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize