i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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