Pappa wants mamma naked
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Randomize
