and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
