my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
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