you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize