Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I touched a dick in church today
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