thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
