Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Randomize
