I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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