this guy showed up at my house asking for his sword and cape. something tells me i shouldn't drink that much again.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
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Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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