he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I told him he was like my favorite pair of jeans; I may not wear them every day, but I'll never get rid of them and they make my ass look fantastic. Needless to say he was not thrilled.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Randomize