so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
i was born a porn star she said
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
