I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Randomize
