The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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