Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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