I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
