Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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