I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
