The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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