Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
