I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize