I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize