i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.