I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
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