she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
