Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
My Higher Power is John Stamos
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
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