Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
this will be a night to untag.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
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