Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Randomize
