Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
