I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
