Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
What a dumb baby whore.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize