**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
My penis needs a shock collar
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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