Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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