That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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