i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
