I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
My dick has a subreddit
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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