There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
