you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
we're so committed to being not committed
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
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