I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Randomize
