Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
