Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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